What is it that makes a man feel a truly strong connection with a woman - the kind of emotional connection that makes him fall in love? The answer may surprise you, because we women have all been taught the complete opposite!
This letter is all about a man's complete devotion to you - and how to ALLOW him to devote himself to you! I'm going to tell you how to create the feeling in him that COMPELS him to chase after you and STAY devoted to you even when he's "caught" you.
If you look back over most of your relationships and discover a pattern where they never quite bloom the way you want them to - then it's possible you may have been taking the wrong road to the path of love.
First - I'm going to lay out a completely NEW road for you to take to love, so I want to make sure you're going to be very GENTLE with yourself if you can relate to the descriptions below.
All of us women have taken the wrong road in our attempts to get close to a man - including me.
I've taken the wrong road so many times before finally discovering how to create a truly loving relationship that I broke my own heart many, many times.
But - when I started taking the right road, that's when I found my husband.
WRONG ROAD #1: THE LOGICAL ROAD (About Your MIND)
As a smart, independent woman, you're probably very good at shining during a discussion and engaging a man on an intellectual level.
You can easily impress a man and make him enjoy your company, but you may often feel disappointed to learn that he feels no chemistry between you - even if you have a great deal in common.
That's because when you try to connect with a man through his mind, he doesn't feel a thing!
For a man to fall in love with you, he needs to feel touched by you in a deep, connected, emotional sense.
WRONG ROAD #2: THE PHYSICAL ROAD (About Your BODY)
It's SO easy to think that a man's interested in being in a relationship with us because he's physically attracted to us.
Or because sex is "great."
The truth is, and despite what we've all been taught to think, men do not become emotionally attached through sex - even if it's fabulous.
Yes - men DEMONSTRATE their deep feelings for you through sex (it's the way they work because of their hormonal system), but that deep connection inside him created by his hormones only lasts for a few minutes!
While he's going to APPRECIATE you for enjoying being with him physically, it's not the reason he - or any man - falls in love.
Sex is only a small part of the whole picture for him.
Relying on a physical connection with him will only get you a broken heart - not a committed life partner.
WRONG ROAD #3: THE SPIRITUAL ROAD (About Your SPIRIT)
If you're like many women who are committed to spiritual growth, then you also enjoy being with a man who shares your values. This is a wonderful thing to look for in a partner, and if it's important to you, then spirituality will be an especially rewarding component of your relationships.
But it's so easy to mistake the friendship that can grow between two people who worship in the same way, who care about the same things, and who are devoted to their families or community.
It may seem like a passionate, emotional bond, when what has actually developed is just a deep friendship. He'll tell everyone what a great woman you are, but he won't be dreaming about you night after night or longing to hold you in his arms.
So if we can't win his heart by connecting with his mind, body or spirit... what do we do?
THE RIGHT ROAD: THE EMOTIONAL ROAD (About Your HEART)
Contrary to popular opinion, and to what we women have all been "taught" about men - men are not averse to emotions.
Feelings don't scare a man. What puts a man off, turns him off, and makes him want to run is "drama." There's a big difference between feeling and expressing your emotions and "doing drama."
A man actually yearns for a woman who can help him feel his own feelings - that's how he knows you're the ONE woman who loves him and accepts him as he IS (and as he's AFRAID he is), and that's how he finally, gratefully feels he can be himself.
If you're not able to feel your feelings and love yourself despite them, he won't get the sense that you will also create the same safe space for him to feel his feelings. No matter how much you try to "reassure" him that you love him - even with his faults - he won't believe you.
What he'll believe is that you'll judge him as harshly as you judge yourself.
Basically - if you're not in touch with your feelings, he won't feel safe expressing his.
SO HERE'S YOUR ACTION PLAN:
The next time you start to feel something around a man, don't second guess yourself. Don't talk yourself out of your feelings or stop yourself from expressing how you really feel.
Let's say he acted moody and distant on a special date. Instead of letting it go or suppressing the emotion, you can tell him exactly what you're feeling. You can try something like this:
"I feel confused and worried about what's happening here. Is there something I should know?"
Speak the truth without anger or drama. Just say what happened, what you felt, and what you feel.
DON'T BLAME HIM OR MAKE HIM WRONG.
Remember, you don't know why he's doing what he's doing. All you know is YOU.
Once you start making subtle shifts like this in your communication with a man - and speaking truly from the heart - I know you'll be amazed (and surprised) by the almost instant closeness it creates between the two of you.
My Love Adviser